Two Adults in a Room Cannot Be Optional
This week I had the opportunity to chat with a friend who has recently planted a church in our area. As we discussed his challenges of building a church and children’s ministry from scratch, he asked me to tell him again why I was so adamant that there always be two adults in the room. There were only 3-5 children after all.
This is one of my non-negotiables in kidmin, particularly in preschool ministry. Safety and accountability is huge on my list in preschool. I am a little bit of a freak about it. Here’s what I communicate when I share why I’m passionate about this issue:
– Basically I don’t really trust anyone. I’m sure on some level I need counseling, but let me tell you the story that ruined me. When I was in middle/high school, I had a student pastor who I adored. He was very foundational in my growth as a new believer. He moved on before I graduated, but I kept in touch occasionally with him and his wife. He ended up pastoring a church within a few hours of where we live now. Imagine my shock when my best friend from home called and asked if I had watched the news. This pastor (who I would have written you a glowing reference for, by the way) had been arrested for molesting friends of his daughter when they spent the night. Wow. I remember asking my husband, “If you can’t trust sending your child to your pastor’s house, who do you trust.” I’ll never forget his response: “No one.” Again, our response is probably extreme, but that story rocked us.
– 1 Peter 5:8 says that Satan is a roaring lion, seeking who he may devour. When it comes to our kids, we can not be too careful because all it takes is one moment of stupid and even a great person can be devoured by temptation that devastates lives.
– It is our responsibility to protect our kiddos, no matter what. Two adults in the room provides accountability and protection for the kids.
– This policy also protects the volunteers. Kids can make up some crazy stuff or parents can jump to wrong conclusions. If a volunteer is falsely accused, who will help them if there is not another adult in the room.
– Volunteers will often wave away extra help, insisting that they can handle the class themselves. I’m sure they can, but we just can’t let them.
– One of the adults needs to be a lady. We have been blessed with incredible men volunteers who I love dearly. And I’m sure it is extremely sexist, but I don’t want a man having to change my little girl’s diaper or help her go to the restroom.
– Husbands and wives in the same room really need a third person. A spouse is going to side with a spouse in any situation.
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down,
one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.